A Time when l Was brave

l reckon the content of this could change depending on the day its written.

l can think of examples such as::

* in my teens saying no to things that l didn't want to do. standing up and resisting peer pressure. That's brave isn't it.

* heading abroad as an au pair alone when l was 19 because l didn't want to be unemployed in Ireland and l wanted to travel.

* taking a chance at 23 and going to college part time by night in spite of a lack of confidence in my academic ability and moving onto to full time degree programme by day

*taking on a job I really wanted but that was physically and emotionally challenging, and learning so so much from it.

* taking off to Austrailia with a group of people, most of whom l hadn't met prior to the airport, and heading off for 13 months on a huge adventure round the world.

* taking the plunge into a relationship with somebody l knew very well and working through the awkwardness and teething problems and seeing the potential for a lifelong partnership.

*undertaking another degree programme while working full time and building a relationship and buying a house...juggling so much, but looking ahead ....

* starting a family, bringing life into the world.

*standing up to bullying and harassment over a  long term period in a workplace and constantly trying to address it in a positive way

These all seem like brave and bold choices in some respects

However, l feel the real bravery is in the more private battles such as:

* knowing when to walk away from something that is damaging you

*knowing when my body, mind and soul had had more than enough

* allowing myself the chance to step out and acknowledge poor health

* allowing myself time to be sick, to take doctor's advice

* allowing things to slide, such as personal appearance, how tidy the house is, how grey my roots are...

*learning to just be, to stop , to breathe, to pause, to reflect, to observe, to learn

Then after this the bravery comes from:

* taking the time to build yourself back up again

* to decide how to proceed from here

* learning lessons from before and choosing differently because of this

*avoiding situations that are not positive
* avoid people who are negative for you
* Learning to read how our bodies communicate with us
* being able to communicate to others how you are feeling

I think that often this is where the real bravery shines through